What Being A Mum Means To Me: Joanne Townsend

Mum, What Being A Mum Means To Us

Written by Joanne Townsend

We all have expectations of what motherhood will be like before we have our kids. We have thoughts on everything we would do when it comes to sleep, feeding and even telling the small humans off and we plan to put it all into practice when the baby arrives. However, when your little person arrives in your life, it’s a shock to the system as reality kicks in. Motherhood is a wonderful, amazing, yet exhausting time of your life and it’s not something you can plan or really prepare for. All those rules you might have had before go out the window and all little people are so different with their own needs and opinions. Therefore, you can’t really plan how to parent your child until you get to know them and find out who exactly this amazing bundle of joy is. You also can’t anticipate the love you will feel for this little one when they arrive in the world. It’s crazy how protective you feel over this small human and how you will do anything for them. Even though you have just met them, it feels like they have been around all along. While you obviously change a bit when you have kids, it’s so important to remember you are still you and to use your own experiences and feelings to mother your child. After all, those parts of your personality make you the unique mum that your child will love.

Of course, the role of a mum is hard to get to grips with. Even with my daughter now coming up to 2 years old, I’m still learning my role as a ‘mum’. After all, every day your little one changes so much and there are new challenges to face as a mum.  Therefore, the role of a mum constantly changes and I expect this will continue throughout the whole of her life. For now, I ensure I’m the person my child goes to when they feel sad or happy. I love the fact she will smile over to me if she does something amazing or astonishing and the same goes when something upsets or worries her. I want to be the person who makes her feel safe and reassured. I also feel my role is to encourage her if she does something good and tell her no when she is doing something she shouldn’t. I also try to teach her new things and help her to develop and learn. That way, I hope she will grow to be ambitious and willing to try new things. I also show her how to be nice to others around us. Hopefully she will then will grow to be kind and respectful to everyone.

I love my role as a ‘mum’ and look forward to building that tighter bond as my daughter grows up.

What Being A Mum Means To Me: Alice

Mum, Uncategorized, What Being A Mum Means To Us

From an early age, I had the desire to be a Mum. I fantasised about falling in love and being married and building a dream life. Whether it be down to overwatching of Disney films or a natural, animal instinct, I knew that having a family of my own was what was meant for me. I’ve always loved babies and children, but nothing prepared me for the level of love that you feel when you have your own.

When I discovered I was pregnant I was totally shocked. It was unexpected and I was unprepared, but there was something so magical about seeing that little heartbeat for the first time, and from that moment onwards things seemed to fall into place. I got engaged and bought a flat with the person I loved. Even though he came earlier in my life than I expected, Ted has been what I needed at just the right time. I was feeling lost about my place in the world, where I was going and what I was doing, and being a mum has helped me refocus on my goals.

For me, being a mum is about learning to love in a brand new way. It cannot be compared to any other sort of love. It’s both unconditional and indescribable. I look at him and I can’t believe that I created this little ball of energy and curiosity who is so clever and strong with the most charming personality already and a smile that is going to break hearts. How could he possibly be mine?

I love that I can share my passions with a mini me. I dream of the day we can write stories together and have Marvel movie marathons and read Harry Potter until we fall asleep. But most importantly, I can’t wait to see what he enjoys and what his passions blossom to be. I find myself full of wonder and what-ifs. Is he going to be good at football? What subject is going to be his strongest at school? Will he go to university? Will he have a family of his own one day?

However, the anticipation of the future does not stop me from enjoying each and every moment with him. Putting my phone down, turning the TV off and singing to him, reading to him, playing with him, and listening to him giggle and look up at me with his big gummy smile is the reassurance I always need to know that maybe, just maybe, I am doing a fantastic job.

Being a mum has been full a sacrifice for me also. Breastfeeding has meant I have had to miss out on nights out and time with my friends. I can’t afford to be selfish anymore, spending money on holidays and endless amounts of clothes. I can’t just go out and do what I want. But I was always prepared for that sacrifice, and as Ted is getting older I am getting more and more of a break, and a little bit of freedom and ‘me’ back. What is very poignant is that whenever I’m not with Ted, he is all I think about still.

However, motherhood has also opened up new opportunities for me. It’s got my creative juices flowing and meant I’ve finally committed to something I love- writing. Without being a mum, this blog would never have come to be. It’s also meant I’ve made new friends, and become closer to my old friends, who respect me as a mother and what I have achieved.

Being Ted’s mum is a new chapter to the book of me- a new part of my identity. I’m never going to be a conventional, stereotypical mum. You won’t find me baking or attending sensory classes, but I will always be there when Ted needs a cuddle. When he needs feeding. When he needs love. When he just needs his mummy. Being a mum has made me so much more confident as a person. It’s helped me embrace who I am and also made me realise I don’t care if others don’t like that person. Yes, I can be shy and a bit awkward. Yes, most the time I am in my very own Wonderland. Does that matter to Ted? No. He looks at me like I am the most wonderful person in the world. That little look of love is the drive behind my every choice and motivation and I am grateful that motherhood has been so kind to me so far.